"Football is like chess, only without the dice" have to Lukas Podolski once said. Maybe football is also like "Man, do not be angry", but without farmers. We do not know, no one's inside - in contrast to these two gentlemen here, who care as they age their penchant for strange hair and the semi-final show tonight at the gym today AufVeltins want to know where the Barthel brings the must. This is exciting: mates of the Louis Felix? Dice Schalke, Bayern out? Magath or shakes with anger because Van Gaal already knows all the tricks and the farmer Olaf Thon just before the Substitution the clipboard between the horns of all?
The answer's as always auffer place. And here, for simplicity from 20.00 clock in the live ticker of Liza world, as always, biased, offensive and rude. See you later!
LIVE TICKER FC Schalke 04 - FC BAYERN MUNICH
19:59 - Good evening, everybody would say Heribert Fassbender at this point, but he can not just because he has to wash his Porsche Opladen.
20:01 - The parties on both sides have taken great care to today's match hochzujazzen a bit artificial. Schalke's foul play as often as no other, Christian Nerlinger said. Felix Magath responded by digging through databases and can be found that has so often played Christian Nerlinger earlier foul like no other. BOOM!
20:04 - Under particular pressure is therefore of course, the arbitrator who listens to these days somewhat uncanny to Kircher and beautiful Rottenburg am Neckar lives.
20:07 - For some reason must always be at the referees even the residence the other named, although no one knows where the hole is actually relevant. But this custom has in the past led to fine-sounding phrases. My all-time favorite is of course Mr. Niebergall from Rammelsbach, followed by Dr. Umbach from Rottorf. Vain poetry.
20:11 - one has already won something, namely Mark van Bommel. Which won the Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam with the voice Prize 2010. Is not it? There's that!
20:14 - The reason given was: Van Bommel's rhetoric was well developed, he did not use the phrases of the language of football and analyzed always understood the game. Assessed were speaking rate, intonation, clarity and reasoning. Grammatical errors led as well as the use of stereotypes and Chinese trade to point deductions.
20:16 - In third place was the way Ruud van Nistelrooy.
20:21 - Then times to the financial statements, first Schalke: Neuer - Rafinha, Höwedes, Bordon, Westermann - Matip - Kluge, Baumjohann, Rakitic - Farfan, Kuranyi.
20:22 - And then the Bayern: Butt - Lahm, van Buyten, Badstuber, Contento - van Bommel, Schweinsteiger - Robben, Olic - Klose, Mueller.
20:26 - Small correction: When playing Schalke but not Rafinha, but Zambrano. But sounds pretty similar.
20:32 - And Matip not play, but Luke Schmitz. If you check that relies on the "kicker"!
20:35 - Madame Ribéry was announced today that he wishes for the future of a five-year contract for his wife and lots of sun. The present is different: a place on the bench and artificial light at Schalke.
20:39 - Ha! The first foul of Kuranyi! Here we go again!
20:43 - The ARD-man calls a foul by Westermann 'defensive impulse. The Magath will have no doubt. Baumjohann and Olic, meanwhile, provide for, say, attacking impetus. The rest wish them success.
20:46 - Robben today with a short length trousers. The crucial missing by inches. New unknown.
20:48 - The Emo look Holger Badstuber has been an emo haircut but he is contractually forbidden just like a tongue piercing. Too bad.
20:50 - Löw polkt in the teeth, Bierhoff picks his nose. Högschde discipline is somehow different.
20:52 - already 26 ball contacts for Badstuber. It smells after a penalty shoot-out.
21:00 - Contento called by her first name Diego Armando, but his attempt to shed looked more like Norbert, Norbert Eder (the older among us remember).
21:06 - Somehow this is not the really big number. Olic processes the left side as a sewing machine, but a Christian Ziege cross-memory fails after the other. Klose dreaming of the national team, Kuranyi is considering whether he preferred not to after the break to go home.
21:11 - Schalke fans call "slide, slide!" Play is not at Stuttgart?
21:15 - Heiko Westermann has a hairstyle like Gabriele Krone-Schmalz. And shoots so similar on goal as they did.
21:19 - tree and Johann van Bommel at the Air-Soccering, that is a sort of air guitar playing on the football field. Kircher referee stopped the deposit and gives a free kick for Schalke. Van Bommel is complaining about the bad B-grade.
21:21 - zero zero at the break.
21:31 - Somehow everything is as always: Bavaria with more possession, but the last pass is not, Schalke plays ugly, but relatively easy to keep away harm from their own box. After it fouls the ARD is 10:2, according to the rude host, and if it succeeds Kuranyi again, Lahm to carry on the artificial turf in the coaching zone, it has a good chance that the Bayern defender replaced with second-degree burns is.
21:33 - In the anti-racism spot of the DFB is still Maria-Theresia Metzelder, the potato salad on the table. Would have to update it again. The mother of Serdar Tasci certainly can cook just fine.
21:37 - Next door, the coach has quite rightly on the Facebook chat through to the live stream of the ARD . With such a concentrated expertise, I can actually pack.
21:38 - Löw makes room for the bad game in charge and calls for the dismissal of the Greenskeepers. In fact, the playing field looks like as the whole of Gelsenkirchen after the Second World War: craters everywhere. Anyway, it goes on. Must be yes.
21:40 - Rakitics second goal. For the first try, he might have can be attributed to another field goal, this one is for what's in any sport.
21:42 - What may have also threatened more Magath in the cabin: It seems to have worked. Kuranyi almost as freely as before Butt seals before New. Same result: nothing.
21:50 - "Hunt", call the Schalke fans. Does not the Werder?
21:53 - Badstuber cuts to Kuranyi, but Kircher has forgotten the cards in the cabin. In the case of fouls, Bayern have also already have residue.
21:54 - Schweinsteiger now looks after a foul vulgar but the cardboard. Madame also enters the court, Olic has leisure time.
21:55 - Note to me: Klose ask what he does professionally.
21:57 - Ribéry whispers Zambrano a few Quranic verses in his ear. Kircher goes but in between. Allahu akbar!
21:59 - Schweinsteiger gets a beer at the corner in the back, uh, enough. If you want to call for Veltins beer.
22:07 - Oh, la, la! Madame vernascht two Schalke, but Mueller is stalking a miserable end there. Gottlob said that was the place to blame. If the coach finally said that. And Mueller is so international.
22:09 - For Schalke, Olaf Thon is warm, with Bayern Jean-Marie Pfaff. One must think so also to the penalty shootout.
22:19 - Schweinsteiger Sanchez played the ball into the feet, which strives to be fair, but his teammates keep a respectful distance. The subsequent edge would Katsche Schwarzbeck still easily brought under control. Badstuber same, only without the subjunctive.
22:21 - Schweinsteiger's almost like Henry tries against Ireland, which is why New echauffiert like Udo Lattek after twelve Pils in the DSF. But unlike Henry walks the ball into the goal. One more minute.
22:25 - extension. Olaf Thon said that he had brought a player named "Hey, you" instead of Matip, but will still have learned a lot. He is also a new best for the German goalkeeper, but at the halfway a 8:7 for Schalke.
22:28 - For a 6:6 like 1984 it is now probably a bit late. Daniel van Buyten looks not as if he wanted to allow such a result. But with a bruised cheek bone is seen always a bit desolate.
22:32 - "Bayern can still go twice," clarifies Gerd Gottlob. That this is so, has reasons. They are called, among other things Altintop and Tymoshchuk.
22:34 - "This game is only a game when a goal is scored," said Gottlob. A case for Arnd Zeigler's Calendar.
22:35 - Klose, Klose again. Just kidding. Wanted to see if any are still alive.
22:46 - And again for 15 minutes over. Still zero zero. Everything seems settled with a shootout, but I'm not so sure. Butt, for example, would quickly go to bed: He yawns already. And Alabama is on the Bayern bench still a minor.
22:53 - TOOOOOOOOOORobbenOOOOOOOOOOR!
22:55 - So it is simple: get ball to the corner flag, pulled inward, and then off with the thing into the bulging pleasure. Then pulled out the shirt and saw yellow. One zero Bavaria.
22:56 - As thanks, he must now do the shower. Tymoshchuk comes. When the time is not an error.
22:59 - Ribery is running alone on New and can make everything gets clear, but not even a field goal so often. Two minutes.
23:02 - Höwedes rammed the ball over Butts box. Magath rammed Hollerbach, therefore, the arm into the ribs. The final seconds run.
23:04 - And that's it!
23:09 - "There are two systems collided," says Gerd Gottlob. And he is right: What Schalke have played was real socialist football, Bayern have made it as the Americans: stable and with individual class.
23:10 - Schweinsteiger complains that he has to run more than Robben (The above all is the short distance "). Robben finds again that Bayern were stronger than the conditional Schalke. In your face, Felix Magath!
23:15 - Gabriele Krone-Schmalz aka Heiko Westermann riefenstahlt something of the "absolute will" and mourns not reach the penalty shoot-out after ("we had clearly won"). Meanwhile, the ARD shows again the gate seals, has no means to get the ball first at the corner flag - he's already gone off so in their own half. And here's van Gaal.
23:27 - Man is somewhere in the end agreed that it was not undeserved, but really well's was not. Robben's goal was formidable, however, and decided the evening. Otherwise, I would like to join Mr test specimens, has in relation to the derogatory judgments about the game very rightly stated: "Who feels the pain as suffering from a very high level."
23:30 - And so this live ticker is decided - thanks to everyone for looking! ARD is now in the "hard but fair", it's about homosexuality in football. Why there is need to sit and Kerner Neururer, reveals itself to me, but so be it.
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